The theatre

I’m through with the warehouse as of Friday, so yesterday I did all the stuff that I have been putting off. I got my oil changed and two new front tires for my car . I called my other agency to let them know that I was available for temp work. I did laundry. I mailed my month’s notice to my landlord. It didn’t seem too pressing because I’d already emailed him and my roommate is staying on here. I also mailed off a congratulatory card to my friend that got married in Chile two months ago. I went over the Arts Monthly that came in this Sunday’s New York Times and picked out shows for Paddy to take me to all summer long. Now I have nothing to do.

I haven’t been to the theater in almost two years, since I lived in Montreal, so I may be over the litany of horrible shows that I saw there. I’ve heard that the Francophone theater is better; all I know is that everything I saw there was absolutely awful. The last one was this ghastly production of A Long Day’s Journey into Night that had an actor that used to be on Anne of Green Gables. Each actor had a wildly different accent, despite the fact that they were supposed to be a family. The actress that played the mother seemed to think that the best way to portray madness was to stare ahead blankly and reach out over her head as if she were a mime trapped in an invisible box. I also saw Burnt Piano, a really awful play about a lady that was obsessed with Samuel Beckett. Her children burn to death in a piano (oops, just gave it away). It was every bit as bad as that sounds. My mind was also scarred by the world’s worst Shakespeare in the park in Westmount. They did Midsummer Night’s Dream set in New France. The wood sprites were turned into Indians, complete with mystical dances and magic powers. They also spoke Cree. I was embarrassed for them, but they were actually trying to be sensitive. That’s what happens when Canadians try to be PC–they make whatever it is a hundred times worse. For some reason, all the music was 1960’s rock. It was simultaneously horrifying and baffling. I needed a break. If this play I see on Saturday isn’t any better than those, I don’t know, I may swear off theater all together.